Hello there my gorgeous gals!

Let me not even try. This song is so sad, it BROKE my heart strings(Thanks, The Fray. I love you but I hate you). But I'm betting you, you've heard this song before: it broke the record for digital downloads that "Fix You" by Coldplay had set(I know that because I obsessed over this song for the longest time. Longer than healthy.).

So, let's just say that as a general trend, all of the songs that I am considering for this are sad. Because happy songs are, let's face it, not that great in the "deep-ness" or the feels department. Plus, I don't listen to as much mainstream music as I think others do, so you're going to have to deal with my sad rock bands and non-mainstream Finnish bands (you'll hear about them soon enough).

So, this song, as all good songs do, starts off with a slow piano melody. The reason it pulls at my heartstrings though is because even though it's a simple melody, it's got this elegantly sad tone to it that repeats over and over again. When you hear it for the first time, you can't understand it. But listen to the song a few times, when you hear the piano melody, your heart will already begin to melt. The way the lead singer sings, you can hear that he wants to scream out loud, that he lost a friend, but he just doesn't have it in him anymore. Until he regrets it, and gets (sort of) angry at himself in the chorus. The way he sings the chorus just about rips my heartstrings off, and then tears them into pieces. I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach and chest that is a pleasurable pain (I know I should be in a mental home. But I need to finish school too, ya know). The way his voice swings and doesn't exactly go along with the beat is totally real life. Someone who has lost a friend to depression and drugs doesn't sing in time, and doesn't always feel happy.

In summation: Find something you love and let it kill you. I.e.: This song.

I would tell you to shave a squirrel, but someone else has, so that wouldn't be funny,
FeatherPaw.

Hey there my awesome awesomes!

So, this Friday, I decided to do the Feel Good Fridays things again because I loved it so much! I've been having escalated acne problems, plus, I wasn't feeling that great about my body image (Well, actually, I was upset about my endurance) but yeah, you get the gist. So, I decided to woman up (Yup, I find the phrase "man up" too sexist. Additional observation: I'm a girl.)

So, I put on my workout clothes, shut the door, blasted my music, and got to it!
I started off by just blasting music, and when I felt like the beat was right, I did random exercises. I managed to do a few sit ups without dying, ONE REAL PUSHUP (I'm very strong, I know), and something that vaguely resembled jumping jacks. I did all these random repetitions and worked up a sweat doing things like that. I tried to stretch, do splits and look like a gymnast (Which didn't work out, I ended up looking like a cat trying to be sexy. Not my intention.) But you know what? Again: I HAD FUN!

I jumped in beat with the music and got myself all breathless. Then, I put on a nice face mask, which calmed me down, and then I took a short and sweet shower during which I played more dance music and participated in shower singing.

The end result: Well, duh, I'm awesomer (my autocorrect HAS to stop prohibiting me from inventing new words) than ever.

Have fun my cutie patooties,
FeatherPaw.

Hey party people!

So I've been noticing lately that I have a low self - esteem and that I haven't been doing anything to up it for a while other than looking in a mirror and almost fainting from shock (Am I that ugly!? Old me would go no shit, but new me after feel good friday's will go with...nah, I guess not)

So, I invented something that makes me feel better! Feel Good Fridays: The Hour Long Shower

So, basically, every Friday that I am home alone having no life, I will do something that makes me feel better apart from looking at cat pictures on the internet. So, last Friday, I had an hour long shower because I was feeling ugly.
(Also, I hadn't showered before school. 'Twas a first for me. Never again. Ew.)

SO. ANYWAYS. I put on a pair of old shorts, and a tank top, shut my room door and turned up the music. Not soft, lovey dovey music, but all my rock music and dance pop music that has no-shit lyrics (that are kinda bad). And I danced. I put on a face mask and put away any mirrors and just danced. And sang. I tore my throat out in break up songs and twerked my butt of while amaturely twerking to the only Skrillex remix I have. And I had fun! I played music that made me feel beautiful, on top of the world and happy. I didn't care what anyone would think of me for doing so, and for once, not giving a crap about others and not being in front of them was SUPER DUPER FUN.

This continued on for maybe half an hour or an hour until I was sweating like crazy. Then, I switched on my shower, washed my hair, scrubbed my body with the best body wash I had and then changed into a pair of cute PJs and a shirt my friends in my previous school (who I was missing) had signed. And for the rest of the time until dinner, I felt so good, it was crazy, and I couldn't stop smiling. That shower gave me the energy to stay up until 3am in the morning and that's when I worked on this blog! It really got my creative senses flowing and I was motivated to do something, and I did something that I had been vowing to work on for so long - my blog!

So it turned out good for all of us didn't it?
Think about doing this sometime!
I'm going to do something entirely new next Friday because it was such a great idea! I feel so much better now even by just revisiting the memory! :)


Loads of Love, (lol that wasn't meant to be lol)
FeatherPaw.

Hey guys!

So yesterday I bought this mix and made a brownie in a mug. But I kinda ended up with a little crusty - tasty brownie, and lots of really tasty chocolate milk. So today, after lunch, I decided to make my own!

I looked at an online recipe for brownies and didn't really have all the ingredients, so I decided to substitute some of them for my own!

Here's my recipe because I want y'all to taste heaven like I did. ♡

What you need to make heaven:

2 tablespoons melted butter
4 teaspoons sugar
2/3 tablespoons of any hot chocolate powder (I used Nescau, a Brazilian kind of Nesquik for making chocolate milk)
1 tablespoon vanilla OR banana essence (banana essence tastes better. Or get any other type of wacky fruit flavored essence! Changing it up is ALWAYS good! ♡)
1/5 cup of milk
1/5 cup of any brownies mix (I used one by Dr. Oetker)

This is how you shake it down:

1. Take a microwavable glass, and put two tablespoons of butter into it. Microwave it for about 45-60 seconds

2. After that, add in the 4 tablespoons of sugar, the Nesquik and the banana essence/whatever essence you're using. Also put in the flour/brownie mix (MIX IS BETTER!), and milk.

3. STIR IT UP! Mix all the ingredients together and then put this mix into the microwave. I heated mine for about 75 seconds. When I took it out, I had a super hot glass full of molten brownie! ♡

Eat it up because you know you wanna! ♡

Hey guys,

I got too overloaded by A-Team and the force of its pull on my heartstrings. :/

So I decided to crawl back to my blog and post a few photos that I've taken of Sao Paulo, the city that I'm living in now. ^_^

Hey guys!

So I've decided to start a new feature: "Songs that pull at your heartstrings"

And happily, the first song of this series is: "The A-Team"

Now this song is something that doesn't just pull my heartstrings, it rips them off in a craze of frenzy feels.
Ed Sheeran was inspired to write this song when he visited a shelter for recovering drug addicts and met people that were on drugs classified as "Class - A."

Now, my feels on this song are going to be ripped open in a blazing fire, so stand back if you can't handle messed-up-girl feels, because they're going to come cascading down upon you.

When the song starts, it plays a soft guitar strum that made me love the song the first time I heard it. The way he softly sings it and the repentant, bubbling anger that he sings with really hurts me. I love listening to this song because the words are so pure, so symbolic. Think about this: a drug addict, whose entire life was about corruption, wasting and impurities. But when she dies, she dies covered in white, her death giving her the final purity of an angel.

That's what grief looks like.
In some ways, it's somewhat beautiful. Grief has its own withering, mad grace that no one understand, but everyone worships and loves.

Heartstrings pulled and stretched,
FeatherPaw.

“She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum.” 
― Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything is Illuminated

Okay guys, so I did a little bit of mooching around on the internet (until 3am in the morning) and I redesigned my blog. <3

Yeah I know, something went wrong with the background, but I hope you guys like it! :)

Have fun reading my posts off of the terrible silver background!

UPDATE: I fixed the problem so now you see normal white background! :D


(Sarcastic yay.) Yay.
FeatherPaw.

Hey guys,

So I promised myself over the summer that I am gong to sincerely try to continue my writing because I feel that it is one thing that I really enjoy and pour my soul out in. As you can see, except for the otehr three posts on my blog, I haven't really kept that promise.


Therefore, this year, I am going to write down every single story idea that I get. And I am going to attempt to finish at least one of them as a book or even a short story. Because I feel that it is important for me, as a person, to write. This is because I have ideas that implode and grow inside my head as a storyline, and as they grow, I become more and more bottled up. It becomes really hard for to interact with other people, and my head just starts becoming a burning broth for what happens next in my stories. Most of them are run of the mill boring as hell stories, but they still sick in my head and bore the hell out of me.

But don't worry, I'm not going to post all of my head crap in here, though you do read most of it.
I will write them privately, and the ones that I feel are worthy of being criticised and hacked to pieces in front of the entire world will be posted for you to humiliate me.

Don't miss the chance! :)

Ooodles and oodles of midnight oil for you to burn,
FeatherPaw.

Hey guys, I know haven't been writing a lot, but I don't exactly have many viewers, so, yeah.

Have you ever watched a chick flick, or read a romantic story book or a play where the characters end up together?

I find myself always wondering about them and what's going to happen to them in the future.

For some reason, happily ever after is never enough for me. I want to know what happens to the people whether they stay together after college, whether they ever get married or have kids. For some reason, I don't know what, I spend hours after a meaningless chick flick or movie trying to analyze the last words they said, the actions they did to find out whether they stay together.

You're probably wondering why this is a big deal.

It's a big deal to me because I yearn for love. In fact, I lust for it. Sometimes, I feel like I could give up anything if I could just find someone who would love me and fill this inner need in me to love someone else. And I don't care what kind of a love it is, even if it is for a minute, I just want someone to laugh with me, kiss me and then cuddle me or hug me to sleep. And his may just be the teenage hormones speaking up, but that's the way it is.

For me, it goes deeper than having a boyfriend or someone to make out with. I want the mental parts that come with a relationship. I want to see my future with someone and maybe someday start a family. That's why, I guess, in the movies, when people find love, I go running after them. I start working out the mental roles that the characters would have to participate in if they continued being in that relationship. I look at characters and I think about how they manage college, work and other things in life together if their love for each other is as strong as it is portrayed to be in the book.

I want to know.

I guess it's just a weird thing, but have you thought about it?
Has anyone really thought about after the happy ever after?

Mental musings,
FeatherPaw.